Measuring Up

When do acquaintances become friends? Friends become good friends? Good friends become best friends? New friends become old friends? And so on.

I'm not exactly sure of that answer, but I am happy to write a post about our good pals Jon and Dana Shank, and seeing that gradual motion over the past 2 or so years. He was a classmate of C's at Stanford and she is his wife, who I became close with through our gang of SO's (significant others, in Stanford-speak). On paper, I don't know if we would have matched up well. They both went to Stanford for undergrad, he was BMOC (big-man-on-campus) with his baseball scholarship and fraternity membership, she was in a popular sorority, etc, and they already had a full docket of friends coming into business school. We were the gay couple from the east coast who didn't know anyone.

Thankfully, Jon and Christian met early on in first quarter and hit it off. We went skiing together in Tahoe for C's birthday their first year in school and they rode with us on the way to and from, where we really got to know each other (and disoverd a common love of Chipotle, which we waited 100+ miles to eat at). GSB events were always more fun when they were around. We were in the ski house in Tahoe last year, and went to Costa Rica for spring break. In short, lots of really really fun common events where we would always enjoy each other's company in the midst of a cool backdrop. (well, mostly cool-- I don't know if you could really call the GSB Auction "cool"....) We affectionately called each other our GSB "best-ies", or slang for best friends in the world of Mrs. Shank.

But it's really been since Jon and Christian graduated last year that I have seen our friendship evolve to the next step. They still live in Palo Alto as Dana finishes her last year in law school, so we're not as physically close as we used to be, but we've still managed to make time at least once a month or so to get together. It can be as casual as a dinner over at their place, or as it was this morning, a brunch in Burlingame, which is about half way between SF and Palo Alto. We sat down this morning and quickly began catching up on all of the latest stuff happening in our lives; C's new job, our hunt for a house, Jon's job, Dana's final stretch in school, etc etc. After brunch, we bummed around the shops in the neighborhood, hanging out, etc. In short, nothing particularly special.

But it is in that very "non-specialness" that I realized how, in fact, it is. When you are with other people in a fairly mundane setting of a brunch and feel like you can talk about anything and the understanding that they will listen, that's pretty powerful. And there we were, doing just that, not really talking about anything special per se, but as I think back over, it was really fantastic.

They are an extremely positive couple to be around. I'm sure they have their differences, but pretty much every interaction we've had been with them shows that the chemistry that they share between them is infectious; they are very much in love with each other and seem eager to share that with the other people in their lives. They have a very wonderful trait of not only being able to share richly about what is happening in their lives, but also of listening to and richly caring what is happening in ours.

I think about that a lot after we see them; there's no question that I'm able to talk about what's going on in my life. But am I also interested to hear about however I am talking to has to say? Do I really care about what they are talking about? Mostly yes, but sometimes, honestly, no. And am I fully investing in relationships that return this kind of warmth and value, and frankly, not investing in ones that don't? Again, mostly yes, but not always.

Making time to see each other? Learning good lessons from each other? Thoroughly enjoying time together and looking forward to the next? Feeling like I can trust them? I know there's no "official" measuring stick from friends to good friends and so on. But with amazing people like Jon & Dana in my life, it doesn't seem to matter much.

You Gotta Have a Plan (Part 2)

I've written about planning before and well, about my difficulties in this area. I mean, I haven't done so bad this far-- got a great man, a good job, like where I am living, etc. and that all couldn't have just happened by accident, right? But if you ask me where I am going to be in 10 years and what I want to be doing, do I know the answer? Does anyone?

Thankfully, there are people out there who do. One of them is my Dad, and today is a really happy day in the Baker family. He's been someone to look up to all my life for a lot of reasons, but today I get the amazing honor of saying I'm proud of him. You see, about ten years ago, after 25+ years in the construction business, he decided to switch career paths and move to the lighting industry. He became president of a company that an old friend of his had founded but needed a seasoned executive to come in and take to the "next level". I remember when he called me to tell me about it; after serving as VP at his then company for many years, this was his opportunity to actually run a company and the long-term goal would be to grow it large enough so that it would be acquired. I nodded as I listened, even though I didn't really know what he was talking about. Acquired? What does that mean? Why is that a good thing? But it did always stick with me.

One of the most amazing things about my Dad is that although he is one of the funniest people I know, when it comes to work and business, no one takes it more serious. As I have come to learn more about business and Christian was going through his MBA, we would get involved in some pretty hefty discussions about Hanover Lantern. He would proudly tell us about how well the company was doing and talk about the future and his vision for what it would hold. Although we didn't directly talk about it much after that first conversation, he was working his butt off to grow the company and ultimately position it for an acquisition.

And so it has come. The company was acquired yesterday by one of the largest lighting manufacturers in the country. Even better, they are going to keep the company as a separate division so everyone gets to keep their jobs in the same place. That is, except for Dad. He decided that after being his own boss for so long, he just didn't want to work for someone else again. When we spoke this morning after the happy congrats and all, he told me he realized you come to a point in your life where time becomes more important than money, and he wants to spend time with my stepmom, etc. Amazing-- he's teaching me about life even through all of this business stuff.

The first thing I thought this morning when I read the press release (!) about the acquisition was that discussion we had way back when he first told me about the move. Everything he has done with the company has been moving towards this point and he achieved it. He laid out a plan and accomplished it, pure and simple. There's been many before and I'm sure many to come, but what better lesson to get from your Dad?

So while I'm certainly not at his level of planning yet, I'm trying. And I have a brilliant role model to show me how it's done.

Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!

Moments of delight are something we talk about a lot at Yahoo! in terms of product design. When a product takes care of something for you, like say, remembering your personal information from last time you visited a website, that's nice. But when something comes along that anticipates a need you didn't even know you had, that's the true delight.

Christmas came in January this past week when my new Nintendo Wii arrived fresh from a shipment from Ebay. Christian had originally meant it to be a Christmas present and even waited in line over 2 hours (!) at J&R Computer World in NYC when they first came out back then. It wasn't meant to be since they were out by the time he got inside the store and they were all over $600 on Ebay. The one I bough ended up half that price, less than a month later, a good lesson in Christmas buying hysteria.

So the set-up for this system in case you don't know is that it comes with a controller that is a bit different than most video game systems. This controller is actually used as an instrument in the games. The system came with a sports disc that includes seemingly hum-drum games like tennis, golf and boxing. Except this time, rather than pressing buttons to serve and volley, you actually swing the controller to hit the ball. It's most impressive in tennis, where you actually have to stand in front of the TV and dart back and forth to get the ball. I got a second controller and Christian and I actually played tennis in our living room last night and worked up a bit of a sweat doing it!! What fun, and for any of you in SF who want to come over and give it a try, let me know! Playing the game, you can really feel like the designers of the system decided to just make it, well, plain fun, and were looking to delight the users of it.

I had a similar experience with the nifty Nike/iPod connector that my brother and sister-in-law sent me for Christmas. Its a small piece you can plug into your iPod to keep track of how long and far you go when running. I've used it a few times so far and think its a great invention. But I had an extra delight when I went for a run earlier this week-- when I completed the run, the normal female voice-over came on the headphones and said the time of the distance of the run, as it usually does.

But then a man's voice comes on and says "This is Lance Armstrong. That was your longest run so far! Congrats and keep up the good work." My first reaction was "are you kidding me?!!" and then I thought "Thanks, Lance!" and I can't wait to hear that again. How incredibly motivating and a small but thoughtful touch the designers added.

So I didn't really ever think that I wanted to play tennis in my living room or have a doo-hickey that connects to my music player to keep track of when I exercise. But I wouldn't want to live without them now. And to that, I'm sure the owners of the products are delighted themselves.

Free Music!

Everybody, including me, loves free stuff. I remember when the original Napster came out—it was before I even had a computer at home. I was visiting my Mom and decided to see what all the hoopla was about. In a matter of minutes, I was downloading a lot of music that I could only dream of finding before, especially in the arena of dance/electronic music that I like. I freeloaded for awhile until Napster and its successor Kazaa were eventually shut down; around the same time, I got my first iPod and iTunes came out for the PC, so downloading became legal and guilt-free.

But free downloads are back, dear dance music fans, this time in the form of podcasts. (For the uninitiated, podcasts are like radio shows that people record with their home computers and can consist of music, talk, video, or a combination of all three.) DJs and producers alike create sets of music, upload them to iTunes or their own websites, and allow users to download them, add them to their iPods and they are off. Most often they are sets about an 1-2 hours long, and they are totally free. Yes, you can’t rip singles you like out of them, but I’ve still found it to be a great way to discover music. If you subscribe, any time a new one is up, it automatically downloads and you can have it set to sync to your iPod. Its like getting a free mix CD every time one shows up!

So here’s a list of my current favorites:

Boramusic.com HouseCast

A DJ from Hartford , CT (of all places) named Kered is solidly my favorite podcast. He is a DJ and a promoter for events in Hartford, so each one consists of a 30-40 min set by Kered himself, followed by an interview with whatever DJ is playing his club that weekend, and then a 30-40 min set by that DJ. The guest DJs are some giant names—Deep Dish, Gabriel & Dresden, and the like. But it’s usually Kered’s sets that I prefer—chock full of the funky electro house sound I’ve come to like since I moved to SF. (Warning—the interviews are usually wildly insipid—the DJs say crap like “I like to take the people on a journey” and stuff like that—just hold down fast forward on your iPod during these parts and enjoy the music!) Often times when we are out, I’ll hear a song that I recognize and realize it was on one of these podcasts a few months back. The best part is Kered adds a new one every 2-3 weeks, so its like getting a collection of the coolest new music each month.

Velvethead

A local DJ I found through the cool Y! podcast search, this guy is all about the warm SF house sound that I love. Think DJs like Miguel Migs, Julius Papp and the Hed Kandi and Om labels, and you’ve got this one nailed. My friend Lem would love this-- it’s perfect for poolside grooving. I also like to listen to it at work when I really need to focus on a design I’m working on and want an upbeat sounds that is not too distracting with heavy beats. The sets play right through with no voiceovers, which is nice as well. A favorite is his Naked Music Tribute from August—there’s songs in there any End Up-goer will appreciate, but anyone who likes dance music can enjoy as well. (Diva lovers, there's a bootleg Mary J Blige as the first track on his most recent set that you'll probably like...)

Alyson Calagna’s HouseBlend (iTunes)

Alyson has been an and coming DJ on the gay-circuit for a few years now and has a couple of podcasts that are tasty blends of stuff I like about circuit music—booming beats and female vocals without getting too diva-ish or pots and pans-ish. Christian and I had the pleasure of meeting her in Miami a bunch of years back and she was really cool, and her latest podcast is a well made, high-energy collection of the latest stuff heard in the clubs.

In My House by Flooker (iTunes)

This is one I found on iTunes and the best part about it is he does one every week. He speaks at the beginning in some foreign language, but all of the music is pure House. It can drift to the Euro side of things too much for me, but again, the frequency of new sets showing up is a delight.

Tongcast by Pete Tong (iTunes)

One of the granddaddies of current house music, Pete Tong has been spinning records in England , Ibiza and around the world for what it seems like forever. One of the first import CDs I bought in the mid 90s was by him! His sets are usually pretty upbeat and fun, although he recently has been drifting into more crusty and guitar like sounds that I don't necessarily love, but its always interesting. He actually talks a fair amount between songs and is pretty entertaining, if not for his accent alone. Every track is "essential", but he does call out the names and the mixes of the songs, so it’s a good way to learn who does what.

Bravehound
Lastly, some hottie in Vancouver keeps a blog and posts occasional podcasts which are really off the hook. His blog is worth visiting just to see what he looks like, but the music he produces really is fantastic. The latest one, Groove Tonight, is chock full of electro house goodies, but then he surprises you with a new mix of Janet's classic, "The Pleasure Principal". Tasty stuff, and all free!

So it’s not the same thing as Napster, but to me, still pretty darn good. If any of you know of any others I should check out, please add a comment. Happy listening!

The Value of a Dollar

When you think about it, a dollar really doesn’t go very far. It’s hard to even buy a bottle of soda for less than one. It seems like it really takes a lot of them to do anything at all, and anything you want to do that is seemingly cool, even more. But I have a way of thinking about a dollar that might change your outlook.

It all started many years ago when I was skiing with my family at a resort outside of Pittsburgh during college. I was with my dad, stepmom, aunt, uncle and my then (ahem) girlfriend. My parents had actually treated my girlfriend to lessons for Christmas, so while she was with the teacher, I headed to the back of the mountain with my uncle, who is an amazing skier and quite the partier to boot. He has a set of ski poles that literally unscrews where he was fond of keeping peppermint schnapps. It’s amazing what that can do to keep you warm on the freezing cold lift, especially for the night skiing done on the east coast.

So we’re on the lift, trading shots of schnapps and he was telling me about how everytime he goes skiing, he tries to ski enough times to get it down to a dollar per run. So if the lift ticket cost $30, if he was able to get 30 runs in, it was worth it. After all, he said, skiing is a very expensive endeavour, but if you think about it in terms of a dollar per run, well, then maybe its no so bad. I told him that was a pretty cool idea and then asked for another shot of schnapps.

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized this theory has a pretty broad application. I started to think about it in terms of when I buy clothing—like, if a pair of jeans is $50, if I wear them 50 times, then its only a dollar per wearing, and that doesn’t seem that bad. Shoes are wear it works especially well, especially if they become a favorite pair. I’ve used this rationalization with Christian many times when trying to convince him to buy me whatever it is I want and it is a surprisingly compelling argument.

Take a computer for example. When I bought my Mac last fall, I thought about it in these terms—I use it every day, often times, more than once. If I have it for at least 4 years, which is how long I had my last computer, that’s 1460 days. It made it easier in my head to go for the large 24” monitor version of the Mac! (well, that and I really wanted it…)

So next time you look at one of those crinkled up George Washingtons in your pocket, try and think about this theory. It can a lot further than you think.

Back for 2007

Dear readers (if there are any left):

Sorry for the self-imposed hiatus. Christian arrived back in town right before Xmas and with everything going on and the holidays, etc., writing really slipped through the cracks. But I'm back to writing more often again (already have 2 new entires done, posting one tonight and another later this week), so please start reading again. And as always, I love to see your comments below. If I am going to take a break again in the future, I'll add a post.

Thanks and happy new year.

Razzle Dazzle Em (Or Don't)

My latest list of cool stuff...

Theatre: When in New York last week, Christian and I went to see "Chicago" on Broadway. We had both wanted to see it for awhile, particularly since the brilliant Bill Condon film a few years back that garnered a bunch of well-deserved Oscars. I was able to score some half-priced orchestra seats at the TKTS booth that was only a few block from C’s apt, and we were set.

Unfortunately, we both ended up being very disappointing. Despite the long string of stars that have moved through the show since its re-opening 10 years ago, the best this show could do was Huey Lewis as Billy Flynn. The actress who played Velma Kelly (Catherine Zeta Jones in the movie) was at least 45-50 years old. The production values of the show were high-school grade at best—remember the fabulous last scene of the movie when Zelleweger and Zeta-Jones are doing their last number in front of all of those lights on the stage? The stage equivilant had long strands of tinsel that looked more appropriate for your Aunt Hilda’s Christmas tree. The orchestra took 80% of the stage, which left few opportunities for anything impressive to happen.

I got to thinking about it seems a lot times when expectations are high for something, I feel let down. I hate it when that happens. On the upside, I can’t wait to see what Condon does with the upcoming film version of "Dreamgirls". I was on the fence about the movie until I saw the preview—it looks amazing! (And GO Jennifer Hudson...)

Movies: I caught 2 of the movies du jour over Thanksgiving and fortunately, both seemed to live up to the hype. “Borat” was outrageously offensive as advertised and despite many of the funny parts being given away in the commercials, there was plenty of R-rated (even X??) that they saved for the movie. They found a good way to keep the satire front and center, despite all of the shenanigans. Of course, we saw it in Gettysburg , PA with my brother and sister, and on the drive home, were wondering if the rest of the people in the theatre got the satire...... since they mostly seemed to not be laughing at the same time as us….

We also caught “Casino Royale”, new James Bond flick with the hot hot hottie Daniel Craig taking over as 007, and just debonair The debonaire flake that he had turned into in the last 10 years had grown pretty tiring to me, as of the only reason he was ever able to get out of the crazy situations he found himself in was cause, you know, he’s James Bond. The new movie thankfully casts all of that schmaltz aside and instead re-introduces us to a gritty, conflicted Bond that is vastly more entertaining to observe. I was also surprised/impressed at the somewhat stunning number of times they showed Mr Craig in various states of undress, esp compared with that of his female counterparts. Score one for the boys and girls who appreciate that and note to directors – along with the interesting dialouge and story, more of scenes like in the pic for the ensuing films, please.

TV: There are a ton of great new shows on this year, but its been two old favorites that have regained their mojo this season that I think are worth mentioning here. First is "Desperate Housewives", which has ranged from thrilling (the grocery store episode) to haunting (Lynette's quiet but fierce threat to the chick who was hitting on her husband) to just downright entertaining (this season's mystery gets a bit more interesting with each week). While some of the "funny" parts seem to stretch a bit, I'm happy to say Wisteria Lane is back to its wild wacky self and I'm looking forward to see where it all goes. If you turned it off after last year's mediocrity, you should tune back in.

Another show, which I should be embarrasseds that I watch, is "The OC", which is back with a vengenance so far this year. It's added back in the self-awareness of the lunacy of the whole thing that was lost in the last two years, along with the trademark great music. If you haven't heard "Love You Till the End" by the Pouges, do yourself a favor and download it now. What a great song. The ratings have been in the cellar even for a Fox show, so this could be the last year and it would be at least good to see it go out well.

Tunes: Above & Beyond's album "Tri-State"has been in nonstop rotation on my iPod. It captures the sweeping elements of their bestmadonnamixever of "What it Feels Like for A Girl" from a few years back and I just seem to be reaching for it again and again. Check it out, esp the minimal beauty of track 10, "Good for Me".

Another remixer that seems to be everywhere these days is Dirty South. First popping up earlier this year with some great house mixes, he has a hot electro mix of DM's classic, "Just Can't Get Enough" out now. Of course, it hasn't been released but I was able to track it down on a podcast. I just bought some new software that should allow me to manipuate these files, so stay tuned for some podcasts of my own coming in the new year.

In other genres, perhaps in reaction to the stunning disappointment her new release “20 Y.O.”, I’ve been mining Janet Jackson’s catalogue for some good music and have found comfort in the realm of “janet" and “Velvet Rope”. Its surprising how relevant and fresh both albums still feel a decade later, while the new one is D.O.A, which migh have been a more approrpriate name. At least I just found on iTunes a Bimbo Jones mix of "So Exited", which sounds like it could come from David Harness' deck at the End Up. Go on Miss Janet, where's the good stuff?

And so ends this list of the good stuff.

An Era is Over

I am very happy to report that as of today, Christian and I are no longer in the possession of property in Washington, DC. We successfully closed on our house at Beekman Place and despite the sagging market conditions in the area, were still able to get a deal that sets us up well for whenever we turn to buy here in SF.

But selling the house is not without regret. I read somewhere awhile back that like your first love, you never really get over your first house, and I think that will probably be true for this place with me. At the urging of my parents, I bought the place as a clueless 25-year old after a week long search landed me in a place only a few doors down from where I had been renting for the first 2 years I lived in DC. (Thanks for the urging and support, Mom & Dad!) I moved in right as Christian and I were getting back together after his brief first stint in SF, and before long, he would move in and we would make it our first home. The house became known as the "frat house" since we had so much more space than most of our friends, so people would just come up and hang out. After we got a grille, we started to throw "Frat House BBQs" each Thursday night since so many people went to the beach or out of town for the weekend. There was the legendary post-2000 election party we had for Ted and Todd that Todd couldn't even make it to since he was in Florida. There were also the many nights watching "24" and "American Idol" with Phil, Ted, Derek, Lem and Matt, and the countless other times we entertained there.

And of course we lived there when we adopted Hobbes, who after a rough start of pulling down our newly-installed wood blinds in panic attacks after we left for work, quick ingratiated himself into our lives, where he will be forever. We owned Marty the Miata, Andy the Acura and Murray the Murano during our time there. We went through numerous layoffs and downsizings at my company. I'll never forget the day of our wedding, when I thought we were going to get rained out, when the sun came out after I got out of the shower and I was dancing around our bedroom so excited about what was to come. We remodeled the kitchen and downstairs with tremendous improvements. I found out my grandmother passed away in that house right before we moved. We got to know our friendly neighborhood cop. We laughed. A lot. We built the foundation of the relationship we have today.

So financially, yes, it is a good thing we are making this transaction. Life milestone-wise, also good. But there will always be a piece of 1656C Beekman Pl with me.

** Anyone needing a rock star realtor in DC, look up Charlie Gaynor. He pretty much did everything for us since we were in SF and I couldn't be more pleased with the experience. Thanks to DWK for recommending him!

Reasons to be Happy

On Christian’s urging, I saw the new Will Ferell movie, “Stranger than Fiction”, last night. Ferell plays a straight-laced guy who starts to hear a nararrator in his head, documenting his life, who is a real author writing his story in a novel. The movie starts strong, wanes a bit in the middle, but really brings it home at the end. It reminds you to appreciate all of the subtle nuances that make life the precious thing it is.

And so this is my list for today:

* I had to go on a work trip early this morning, and as I came around the corner to Candlestick Point, looked to the left and saw the sunrise coming up over the San Francisco Bay. The sky was a stunning mix of blue, orange and red as the sun peaked through the clouds. One time Christian and I watched the sunrise in Miami and I said to him “God just turned the light on.” Indeed.

*There’s a batch of good new TV shows this season, and the networks are showing an unusual dedication to them. I read with great pleasure last night that “Friday Night Lights”, a drama set in small Texas town following the local obsession with the high school football team that’s been struggling in the ratings, got picked up for the full season. I watched the first few episodes and was immediately drawn in by the stunningly true depiction of a town very similar to the one I grew up, as well as the star quarterback suffering a neck injury much like the one I did when I was in middle school, although his resulted in paralysis and mine, thankfully, did not. NBC picking up the show for the whole season is a welcome relief, and along with the other pleasant surprises of the season like the doofy fun “Ugly Betty” and the refreshingly real gay courtship and on-screen kisses on “Brothers & Sisters”, its nice to see some quality shows hitting the airwaves and getting the support they deserve.


*Buttermilk biscuits. Mmmmm, I had one at breakfast this morning and they are just yummy.



*Matt & Michael are taking off for a fun 1.5 week trip to London and Amsterdam and I’m really excited to hear about their adventures when they return. Matt urged me to come with them about a month ago and I have to admit, I was very tempted. But we ultimately decided to keep our plans to head home and spend Thanksgiving weekend with my family in PA, and as soon as I’m able to hug my step-mom, who is just recovering from a surgery, or hold my newborn nephew, or clown around with my brother, I’m pretty sure I’ll feel I have made the right decision.

*Work has been going really well lately for me. I was chatting with Titus and he was saying that he admired how passionate I was about my job and sure enough, I am. When I left the Travel industry after 6+ years of working in a field I have a personal obsession with, I was unsure how excited I could get about Customer Care, Matt’s snarky-but-well-deserved- after-all-of-my-payroll comments “help desk” snipings notwithstanding. But through a combination of hard work and maneuvering myself into a good position, here I am. That said, a lot of my goodwill towards work right now has to do with the positive feedback I’ve recently received from my director and also the VP of the business unit that I work in. So managers out there, don’t forget – if you have people in your group are doing a good job, tell them! You never know how far a pat on the back will take them.

*South Africa became the 5^th nation in the world to legalize same-sex marriage yesterday. One of the leaders of a GLBT group in South Africa said “It forced us (South Africans) to consider: what does equality really mean? What does it look like? Equality does not exist on a sliding scale.” A question for the rest of the world and the USA—how is it that of all places, South Africa, home of apartheid, et al, is now one ahead of most of you in equality? Cheers to all of our boys in South Africa!

*I've worked it out that while in San Diego today, I'm going to see my pal Erin. It's always fun when business trips allow you to see a friend as well.

*And lastly, the countdown begins: 1 month from today, Christian returns to SF for good! It can’t come fast enough.

No Camera Required

I really love to take pictures, but I don’t know if I would call myself a photographer. It’s not so much the precision of the picture itself that I concern myself with as much as capturing the memories of whatever it is that I am doing while I am taking the pictures. At pretty much any event I go to with friends, family, Christian and/or Hobbes, I usually have my camera with me to snap at least a few pics to help encapsulate it into memory. And at the end of every year, I put them together along with other mementos into a scrapbook for a Christmas gift for Christian, a tradition that started 1.5 years into our relationship together and will now be entering its 7^th iteration this holiday season.

Since we moved to the west coast, my trips home to Pennsylvania to visit my family have become much less frequent than when I lived a short 90 miles away in Washington, DC. Like anything that was once plentiful and then becomes rare, I now appreciate these visits much more than I used to, and I think the same is true for them seeing me. Pretty much every time I go home, I have my camera in hand, snapping as many pictures as I can of my nephews as they grow up too fast, my grandmother sipping her standard glass of champagne, and other family moments. Often when I call my mom she references having just had dinner with my brother and wife or that my nephews had all just left after spending an afternoon in the pool. I have to admit it’s sometimes hard to hear the everyday things that happen there that I’m not a part of by virtue of where I have chosen to settle my life.

This past weekend, Christian’s mom and stepdad (Jane and Skip) arrived with a moving truck from Dallas to move here to the Bay Area. They had asked if they could borrow our SUV for awhile as they run all of the errands that you need to when you are moving into a new house. So I drove out to see them yesterday to welcome them to San Francisco and check out their new house. Melissa and Alex (C's sister and husband) were also there, with their two adorable little boys, and it was quite a site to see them as they are unpacking in their new digs, just a few minutes from where Melissa lives and about 30 min from our place.

I spent about an hour there, getting the tour of the house, hearing about the plans they have to decorate, and regaling at the size of their yard, as it will be Hobbes’ new vacation home when we are away. After that, I popped over to Melissa and Alex’s and played trains with their 3-year old, Alister for a bit. Then I went upstairs to hang out ("visit", as C calls it) with the adults for awhile, also playing “Mike Tyson’s Punch Out” on Alex’s rad original Nintendo that he got from Ebay a month ago. Then it was time to go, so Alex and Alister drove me back to my house, and we made plans for me to come back out for dinner sometime this week or next.

Once I was home last night, I realized that I had not taken my camera along and therefore took no pictures. And as much as I love to usually commemorate big days like yesterday, what I’ve come to realize is that because of Jane, Skip, Melissa, Alex, Alister and Beckett’s proximity to where we live, we’re going to have lots of days like this. Families who live close to each other do stuff like this all the time; hanging out during the day, eating dinner together, giving each rides, etc. Things like these are going to become much more commonplace, and therefore, the need to take pictures to capture the “preciousness” of it will become less.

Not that I won’t appreciate the increase in family time; if anything, being so far from the family that I grew up with makes me even more eager to invest in the family that I married into here. But for the first time as an adult, I’ll get to have a family living in the same town that I am. What a great feeling.

So my camera may not be used quite as often on these family days, but that’s okay. We’ll just have to take additional trips to Pennsylvania to appreciate coming home to SF and our family here even more.